Could I have been a millionaire in Bel Air?
Could I have been lost somewhere in Paris?
Could I have been your little brother?
Could I have been anyone other than me?
Could I have been anyone other than me?
Could I have been anyone?
He stands touch his hair his shoes untied tongue gaping stare
Could I have been a magnet for money?
Could have been anyone other than me?
Twenty three and so tired of life such a shame to throw it all away
The images grow darker still
Could I have been anyone other than me?
Then I look up at the sky my mouth is open wide lick and taste
What's the use in worrying, what's the use in hurrying
Turn turn we almost become dizzy
I am who I am who I am well
Who am I requesting some enlightenment
Could I have been anyone other than me?
And then I'll sing and dance I'll play for you tonight
The thrill of it all
Dark clouds may hang on me sometimes but I'll work it out
And then I look up at the sky my mouth is open wide lick and taste
What's the use in worrying, what's the use in hurrying
Turn turn we almost become dizzy falling out of a world of lies
Could I have been a dancing Nancy
A dancing Nancy
Could I have been anyone other than me?
~Dancing Nancies by Dave Matthews
Feeling blue today. Filled with anxiety. Feeling like life is hard. In a funk. I know how to pull myself out of this, I have done it before - but I don't want to. Not sure why. Just as happiness is a choice, feeling blue and down can be too. And that is what I am choosing right now. This is not a complaint, just a statement of my day and mood. I want to crawl into a hole and hide. Think and reflect. Last night as I was thinking that I wanted to be someone other than me {hence the DMB lyrics that popped into my head}. Actually just a non-anxious version of myself would be great. Some of the things that bother me are no big deal to other people and vise versa. But sometimes I wish I was a different. I wish that I didn't worry, that I didn't sweat the small stuff. That I could let things roll off and just go with the flow. But I am a worry wart, a dweller, I over-think, over-analyze. I am my own worst enemy.
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